Openness and brokenness in marriage

The enemy will do all he can to keep us from being open with our spouse about our sexual failures. Satan will convince us that confessing them will only bring hurt and confusion, that God has already forgiven us, and that it’s a sin of the past that has been dealt with. However, until we are open with our marriage partner regarding all failures—past and present—we will remain in bondage.

When we marry, we enter into a covenant before the Lord with our husband or wife. I Corinthians 7:4 says, “The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife” The word power in this verse means to exercise authority. Thus, by entering into marriage, we are yielding our right to our own body. It now belongs to God and to our spouse.

All sexual sin is against the body. (See I Corinthians 6:18.) Since marriage partners have authority over each other’s bodies, all hidden sins should be confessed. A wife has the right to know and ask questions regarding her husband’s failures. Her husband’s sexual behavior is her business. The same concept holds true for sexual failures in the wife’s life. Her husband has the right to know about them. They must work together to receive forgiveness and walk in freedom.

The lie that a husband or wife doesn’t need to know about the other’s moral failures is one of Satan’s most powerful tools. As long as we keep any sin hidden in our heart, we are giving him a platform from which to work, and we will remain in bondage. However, bringing past failures to light by making a complete confession to each other, allows the Lord to bring freedom to our lives and breaks the bondage of the enemy.