Slashed Tires and Shattered Windows-a Lesson for Victims
I came out of my home one day many years ago and someone who hated me had slashed every one of our times and shattered the windshield and back window of our car. What they did to me was not my fault, so I refused to replace the tires or the windows. I drove around on four flat tires, with no front or back windows so that everyone could see what someone had done to me. I was a victim and I was going to let everyone see that I was a victim. A policeman saw me and pulled me over. He said, "Sir, I am going to have to impound your car. You cannot drive it that way"
I said, "But officer, it isn't my fault that my car is in this condition. I am a victim."
Seriously, that did not really happen to me. But wouldn't that be foolish of me if I had done that? You see, even though the vandalism would not have been my fault I still would have had to take responsibility for the repair of the car. There is a mistaken notion that just because something is not our fault that it is not our responsibility. That is a terrible way to live. If it was not your fault that you were abused as a child, abandoned by your spouse or whatever it was that brought you great hurt, it is still your responsibility to deal with it in a manner that allows it to be repaired not remain broken. You can drive around life like a victim if you choose but that does not remove your responsibility to allow God to repair your life fully so he can use you for his glory not your own.
We live in a victim society and people like to wear their status of "victim" like a badge of honor.
While you your status of victim might bring you much sympathy and you may be called a hero for openly showing the hurts, God expects you to take responsibility for submitting that brokenness to him so he can repair it and use you. When you remain a victim you are not taking responsibility and two things happen. First, you live as a sympathy figure. Secondly you are praised for your courage.
I have seen this time and time again. It becomes about you rather than Christ. Rather than being more than a conqueror you are no more than a victim. Rather than God getting the glory for the grace he desires to work in you, you are lauded for having the courage to walk around and speak of your hurt. That is as dumb as being lauded for driving around with four flat tires and broken windows. Oh there are plenty of other victims who will give you sympathy or even laud you as a hero because they have never taken responsibility for their hurts either. However, there are others who have been hurt yet you cannot see the hurt because the grace of God has restored them to a life of usefulness. It is your responsibility, even if it was not your fault. It is your responsibility to forgive the one who hurt you. It is your responsibility to have faith that God allows everything for a purpose. It is your responsibility to let God heal the hurt and make you whole again. It is your responsibility to quietly reach out to others who are hurt and lead them to accept their responsibility. Stop playing the victim and take responsibility for the things which have hurt you and stop driving on four flat tires.